


Heartstrings

by CariadWinter



Category: Doom (2005), Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Fondling, Implied James T. Kirk/Leonard McCoy - Freeform, Implied James T. Kirk/Spock - Freeform, M/M, Polyamorous Relationships, Pre James T. Kirk/Spock/Leonard McCoy if you squint hard, Reaper!Bones, Sexual Tension, Unresolved Emotional Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 11:22:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5624983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariadWinter/pseuds/CariadWinter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bones is making dinner. Chris is still surprised sometimes that he's there. Bones just thinks it's silly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heartstrings

**Author's Note:**

  * For [heeroluva](https://archiveofourown.org/users/heeroluva/gifts).



> This fic was written for Trekmas 2015 on LiveJournal and is for the lovely Heeroluva. I don't normally write Pike with anyone, but for her, I tried to step out of my comfort zone a little. It's not much, but it's my gift to her and perhaps one day it will find a life of its own and grow. Who knows ;)
> 
> Happy Holidays everyone!

“What are you doing here?”

That was how the evening always started. Surprise. Leonard suspected it was more of a habit now; the verbal reflex of a once curious mind. At least, he hoped it was. If Chris was still surprised that he was there, after all these years, then they should probably address the issue. 

Later though. After dinner.

“I’m cooking,” Leonard replied. 

He’d been in the process of cutting the chicken into half-inch pieces and placing them in a marinade when Chris had come in. There was music playing softly throughout the apartment. It was something bluesy; gave the place a relaxed feel. A bottle of Saurian Brandy sat on the table, already opened. A single, empty glass sat next to it. Leonard’s was on the counter, half empty. It was only his second of the evening.

Chris limped further into the room, his weight pressing down through one hand into his cane and the other cradling his uniform hat to his middle. Leonard thought he looked both bemused and curious. There might have even been a little heat in that gaze and it made his heart flutter.

“I can see that you’re cooking dinner, Len,” Chris clarified and set his hat down on the table next to the bottle. “Still doesn’t explain [i]why[/i] you are here. I figured you’d be…”

“With Jim?” Leonard cut in as he placed the chicken in the marinade. 

Chris nodded and filled his own glass. “Considering,” the admiral added, but anything beyond that one word was left unspoken.

Leonard moved to the kitchen sink and turned on the tap to wash his hands. “I was with Jim. Earlier,” he told him. “He’s having dinner with Spock tonight.”

Chris nodded and took a sip of the brandy. “How’s he doing?”

Turning from the sink, Leonard shrugged as he dried his hands on one of the dish towels. “Better. He says he feels fine. Doesn’t talk about the rest.” 

He draped the towel over the edge of the sink and then moved to pick up his own glass. “You know how Jim is. He plays everything close to the vest. Especially the emotional stuff.” 

Leonard leaned back against the counter and sipped at his drink; his eyes fixed on the tension in Chris’ shoulders.

Chris nodded, his own gaze fixed on the glass in his hand. “He’ll talk when he’s ready,” he agreed, then added, “if he’s ever ready.”

Leonard snorted and nodded as well. “As soon as those pigs fly.”

Chris smiled and looked up at the handsome man lounging in his kitchen. “Are you worried?” he asked as he set the glass back down on the table and proceeded to slip out of his uniform jacket.

It was a loaded question if ever Leonard had heard one. He shrugged; eyes fixed on his companion. “I’m always worried. That’s like asking someone if the sky is blue,” he pointed out and Chris laughed. Leonard liked that laugh. 

“Depends on the planet,” Chris countered.

“Semantics,” Leonard fired back teasingly. He was half-hard already from this little dance they always did.

They’d never defined this thing between them. It just simply was. It was easy and effortless. No baggage, no expectations, no complications. 

Chris picked up his glass and moved towards him. Every hobbled limp made Leonard want to grit his teeth. Learning to walk again, after Nero’s attack, had been a struggle for Chris. He’d gotten his life back though and then Khan had yanked the rug out from underneath him again. 

“Stop,” Chris instructed softly, stopping in front of him.

He set his glass down on the counter, propped the cane, and then slipped his hands in against Leonard’s sides.

“Stop what?” Leonard inquired with an air of ignorant innocence. He was smiling at him though.

Chris leaned in against him; pressed their bodies together and sighed at the instant warmth. He tilted his face in; lips brushing against Leonard’s ear. “Fixating on what you can’t change,” he murmured softly. “It is what it is. I’m here. That’s all that matters.”

Leonard sighed and settled his free hand on Chris’ hip. “You sound like Jim.”

Chris pulled his head back at the remark and he gave Leonard a searching look. “Is that where the attraction lies?” he questioned curiously.

The doctor’s brow arched high on his forehead; his expression showing just how unamusing he found that suggestion to be. 

“Are you serious?” Leonard countered gruffly; though part of him wondered just how much truth the inquiry had to it.

“Do you have any idea how much you look like Spock right now?” Chris parried and Leonard’s eyebrow shot even higher.

The doctor’s mouth opened, closed, opened again. He was doing a rather impressive imitation of a beached fish and Chris could only chuckle at him. 

The admiral leaned in closer again to nip at the corner of his companion’s jaw. “Why does Spock ruffle your feathers so much, doctor?”

Leonard snorted. “We’re not talking about the hobgoblin right now,” he mumbled. Those lips moving against his skin were doing funny things to him and the last thing he wanted to be thinking about was the damned Vulcan.

The tip of Chris’ nose brushed the skin beneath Leonard’s ear and Chris inhaled the scent of the man. The doctor smelled of brandy and spices.

“You’re right,” Chris breathed against him before he pressed a kiss to the doctor’s neck. “We were talking about Jim.”

Leonard stiffened against him in more ways than one and Chris grinned at that. He knew about the relationship between the good doctor and his captain. It was much like their own, only there was suddenly another player in the mix that threw things off balance. None of them, including Chris, had been expecting the turn that Jim’s relationship had taken with Spock. 

Chris slipped a hand between them; caressed down over Leonard’s stomach and lower to cup the man through his jeans. 

“Does it bother you, Len? The idea of Jim and Spock together?” The words were murmured softly into the doctor’s ear and Chris found his heart beating a little faster when he felt his lover’s prick jerk within the confines of the denim. 

“Is that why you’re here with me tonight?” Chris pressed and squeezed at the bulge pushing against his palm. 

Leonard’s breathing quickened and he’d long since set his glass back down on the counter for fear of dropping it.

“They’ve been growing so close since Jim nearly died. Closer than any captain and his commander have any right to be.” Chris was pushing it. He knew that. The tension building in his lover was worth it though. Or, at least, it would be.

“Is that the game we’re playing tonight?” Leonard breathed back in response. He’d pulled back enough to see Chris’ face and the admiral was grinning sinuously at him.

As simple as the relationship was between the two of them, it had been nowhere close to vanilla. They played their little games and picked at each other in an effort to pull back the many layers that each man possessed. 

Chris gave Leonard’s erection another squeeze. “Just establishing where your head’s at,” the admiral replied. “You’ve been different lately. Edgier.” He pressed closer, mouth hovering close to Leonard’s ear again. “Rougher.”

Leonard’s hands gripped Chris’ hips tightly; fingertips digging into flesh through the fabric. “I’ve had a lot on my mind,” he offered in explanation.

Chris pulled his face around to look Leonard in the eyes and leaned in to brush their lips together. “You could talk to me you know,” he offered. Because they were more than just casual sex.

Leonard tugged Chris closer, trapping the admiral’s hand between them. Their shared breaths puffed hot between them and the doctor captured the admiral’s bottom lip between his teeth. He tugged gently, pressed his tongue to the captured flesh and licked across it before releasing him.

“Didn’t really come here to talk,” Leonard finally replied; voice thick with desire.

Chris pulled his hand up from between them and pressed his palms into the countertop on either side of them. He licked his own lips; gaze darting back and forth between his lover’s mouth and eyes. He pulled away a moment later; hand clasping around the top of his cane as he moved away from his sometimes lover.

“You may not have come here to talk, but I think you need to,” Chris stated as he put the small kitchen island between them. 

He turned to look back at Leonard once he was on the other side and raked his eyes over that handsome face. Leonard just growled out his frustration and combed a hand back through his hair.

“I’ve ignored whatever this is for as long as I’m going to, Len,” Chris told him and settled himself onto one of the barstools on his side of the island.

Leonard grunted, reached for his drink and downed what was left in the glass. He stared at the empty glass for a moment afterward, then abandoned it on the countertop behind him again.

“This whole thing was a bad idea,” Leonard mumbled as he picked up Chris’ glass and downed that as well.

Chris just watched, his arms folded neatly on the countertop as he waited for the other man to continue.

Leonard looked over at him, studied him for a second and then abandoned the second glass on the counter as well.

“You almost died, Chris. _Again_. Jim almost died. _Did_ die. I’m sleeping with both of you. Jim’s sleeping with Spock. The whole of the crew is in therapy. I probably should be as well and we’re all about to head out into the unknown for five years. I hate space. More than anything in this universe, I hate space and I’m going because… because…”

Leonard combed his hand back through his hair again and dropped his gaze to the kitchen floor. “I swore when I started this that I wouldn’t get attached.”

He looked up again, locked eyes with Chris and shook his head. The silence that stretched out between them was thick; filled with a thousand unspoken things.

Leonard finally shrugged. “I broke all the rules, Chris. Every single last one and I’m trying to figure out just what the hell I’m supposed to do now.”

Silence settled between them again, though this time Leonard’s shoulders had slumped. He wasn’t going to say more. Chris knew him well enough to know that. 

“Have you told him?” he asked the doctor. 

Leonard just looked away from him.

“Len?”

…

Silence.

“John.” Chris’ tone, this time, was firm and the name was something he’d not called Leonard since he’d first met the man.

Leonard looked over at him again and those soul-searing eyes of his had gone cold. They didn’t talk about Leonard’s past. They didn’t speak of the man he used to be or the life he’d left behind.

“Why would I do that?” the doctor queried and Chris just huffed a small, soft laugh.

“Because that’s what you’re afraid of,” Chris pointed out, his own tone going hard and firm. “You’re terrified of the ghost in the room with you. Of Jim finding out. Of outliving him maybe. Of outliving me. Even outliving Spock.”

Chris stood and moved to stand in front of his lover again. “You’re so afraid of losing that you forget to live,” he murmured softly. “I hope like hell that you are afraid to lose me because it means that you care as much about me as I do you.”

Leonard’s face crumpled at that and he sucked in a slow breath as he shifted his gaze to the ceiling. Chris just pressed into him again; his face tilting in to brush against the side of Leonard’s throat.

“He loves you,” Chris whispered against Leonard’s skin. “Needs you. They both do. Maybe Spock doesn’t know it yet, but he will.”

Leonard’s arms encircled Chris’ waist and he hugged him to him; his face turning down to press into Chris’ hair. 

“And I’ll be here, waiting.”

Chris lifted his head to look at Leonard and the cold in those eyes melted. Leonard pressed their lips together. It was a slow kiss, sweet and sincere. It said things that Leonard, himself, had never been able to say out loud and Chris was fine with that.

As individuals, they were complicated and complex. There were layers upon layers to each of them. They had their own dark secrets. They had their own desires; some mutual, some separate.

This thing between them though, between all of them… 

It was still simple. Still uncomplicated. Still effortless and easy.

“So what’s for dinner?” Chris asked when they parted.

The smile that curled Leonard’s lips lit up his eyes. “Orange chicken stir fry.”

“Mmm,” Chris hummed and pressed a kiss to Leonard’s jaw. “My favorite.”

Leonard sighed and held him tighter. 

“And for dessert?” the admiral asked; his tone teasing.

The doctor’s answering chuckle rumbled deep in his throat. “For dessert,” he sighed happily and pressed a kiss to Chris’ forehead, “I thought we could talk about the present I got you.”

Chris’ eyebrow arched. “Present?”

Leonard nodded, his smile softening. He let go of Chris and moved away, crossing into the living room to retrieve something from the inner pocket of his coat. It was a long, slender black case. He gripped it tightly in his hand as he moved back into the kitchen and hesitated for only a moment before handing it to Chris.

Chris eyed him curiously for a moment then opened the box. Inside, nestled in a bed of protective foam, was a single syringe. Chris’ breath stilled; his heart giving a painfully hard thump in his chest as he looked up at the man before him.

“Is this…”

Leonard nodded before Chris could finish and Chris nodded as well, his gaze dropping back to the syringe.

“How can you even be sure that it’ll work on me?”

The answer, for Leonard, was simple enough.

“Because I know you.” 

They were the same words his sister had spoken to him once upon a time.

Chris looked up at him again. “And if I say no?”

Leonard’s expression faltered long enough for his insecurities to show again and he combed his hand back through his hair once more.

“Then you say no,” he replied simply. And he’d figure out a way to deal. He always did.

Chris closed the box and set it aside on the counter. “Is this the only one?” he inquired and that subtle hint of curiosity was back in his tone.

Leonard shook his head.

Chris nodded again and reached up to smooth his hands down Leonard’s chest.

“Make sure you don’t let it go to Jim’s head,” Chris warned playfully; though the weight of his own decision was clear in his voice.

Leonard snorted and pulled Chris close again. “Everything goes to Jim’s head,” he quipped back. 

Chris hummed softly and pressed his head to his lover’s chest. “And Spock?”

Leonard shrugged. “That will be up to Jim,” he replied. “If he even says yes in the first place.”

“He’ll say yes,” Chris assured him. “Spock will be a little harder to convince I think. But Jim generally manages to get what he wants.”

Leonard was the one to nod this time. “And you?” he pressed softly. “What’s your answer?”

Chris smiled up at him and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “Dinner first,” he hedged and then nipped at his lover’s bottom lip. “Then dessert.”

It wasn’t a yes, but it wasn’t a no. Leonard could live with that.

For now.


End file.
